Have no fear... Have no doubt...

Being down with a simple flu or a stomach pain causes a lot of stress already. What more with a disease that has no cure? Last year, after going through a series of test, it was revealed to me that I am afflicted with Multiple Sclerosis or MS.

Though it didn't come to me as a shock because when MS symptoms started to come one by one 3 years earlier, I started reading health books and surf the internet. Being " an alumna" of the "Google University", I already got an idea on what's wrong with me. The neurologist just needed to confirm my self diagnosis...

Of course, though I already have an idea on what's bothering me, the doctor's confirmation is something different - it's the reality!

Being an ordinary human being, I started to panic - many questions started to pile up on my mind. Feelings of uncertainty, doubt and fear began to enter my being. And the BIGGEST question that disturbed me was " can I still conceive and have a baby of my own? "

Gosh! All my life, I never dreamt of becoming an executive of a multinational firm, it's not my cup of tea! I am satisfied with my work at UP. And my "kupit" from my parents is more than enough for me to buy all the shoes, bags, watches and clothes that I desire - can't ask for more!

All I want in life that I've always been praying for is to be a good wife to my would be husband and the bestest friend to our kids. I just want a family I can call my own!

As I was trying to search for answers to my queries... depression and anxiety attacks started to haunt me. I almost lost my mind (literally!) because I wanted things to happen right away...

God is good! He truly works in mysterious ways... As I renewed my relationship with Him, I found PEACE, HAPPINESS and CONTENTMENT. He whisphered through my heart " Don't worry. Don't Fret. I am the one in control!!! "

When I look at my future and thing seem black, God reminds me that He is in-charge of tomorrow. Nothing I face now or in the years to come has not passed first through God's hand.

Even if I am weeping and I've lost all, God is planning a new harvest in my life. I need not doubt. I need not worry... God will provide all I need.